now hold up lets talk about geese
supermegafoxyawesomehotnot: look isn’t it adorable that’s a gosling, which is a baby goose, not the dude named ryan but see these fluffy little puffballs aren’t they cute yeah they’re really adorable up until the point when you realize they’re the SPAWN OF SATAN LOOK AT IT ALL GROWN UP IT HAS TEETH THAT’S RIGHT, TEETH TEETH ON THEIR MOTHERFUCKING TONGUE THIS THING WILL FUCK...
neopiacentral: why waste time say long word when short word do trick
horribleawfulcunt: niamliveslarryloves: basedgosh: i hate one direction fans so much i need my whole room to cool down but no this damn thing only blows one way I literally had to read that 5 times… oh my god
sexstiel: this is literally the best video on the internet
nue: nue: once we got our math tests back and this one guy got a D and he was really quiet for a minute and i expected him to be really sad or something but instead he puts his fist in the air and goes “YES, THIS IS GONNA RAISE MY GRADE!” and i think that pretty much sums up math right there if i had a dollar for every time someone made a “he got the D” comment on this i would have enough...
lolminoot: Never trust anyone that puts noses in their smiley faces.
knifefarty: iwonthellamaatthefayre: wibblywobblyuniverse: knifefarty: if i had the power to control time i would probably just use it to sleep more if you stopped it in a test at the last minute just wandered off, brought your notes in, finished it correctly and put them back that would be a good idea too If you could stop time you wouldn’t do tests you could just take stuff from shops...
mew-squared: In 2009, a man married a video game character In 2007, a woman married the Eiffel Tower In 2008, a man married a life-sized doll Also in 2009, a woman married a roller coaster And in 2005, a woman married a dolphin please explain to me why people still say that gays shouldnt be able to be married to preserve the sanctity of marraige
trisarahdactyl: michaelceratops: osointricate: I wonder what President Lincoln would think about there being a movie about him killing vampires. “whats a movie” #’fuck you im not going into another theater’
hec-ticglow: love how bus drivers give each other that little wave or nod when their buses pass like they’re in a secret bus driver club who are actually on a way more important mission than what seems, they’re actually out preventing public mayhem and evil villains on fake nuclear buses.
geometricdeathtrap: *nervously adjusts collar* *deep breath* “fuck the police” “i dIDN’T MEAN IT”
oomshi: britney spears a fish to feed her family
theinsufferablefan: broadway-aradia: what if you had an oven that could make things cold instead of hot omg
sexhaver: boredlord: What do teens like?!? Is it memes? Memes about skeletons? Piss? Communism? this post is 20x funnier if you imagine a CEO shouting it at his board of directors
vexarion: ifyoucarryonthisway: i need a job where i work one hour a week and i get paid a thousand dollars a minute
yaygocats: discomplete: “i want to wear shorts because it’s hot but i really hate my legs” an autobiography “I want to wear shorts but i didnt shave” the sequel.
egberts: BATHTUBS ARE JUST REVERSE BOATS
starksexual: i was at the bus stop with my sister the other day and for no apparent reason, she says: ‘dude, there are more dead people in the world than living people’ and the woman standing beside me whispered ‘holy shit’ and i fucking lost it
Tumblr app: I'm done loading
Me: but what about all these blank pictures and gifs
Tumblr app: did I fucking stutter
blackromney: blackromney: whats a good excuse to get out of soccer practice i need to know asap excellent answers, thank u friends
bnagbros: a-very-weird-and-clever-boy: bnagbros: Yahoo spent $1.1 billion on porn Still cheaper than most porn wtf kind of porn do you watch
i can’t stop laughing fuck